Deity work is extremely popular among modern pagans, but it can be hard to know where to start. I get a lot of questions about how to approach deity work, how to tell if a god is reaching out to you, how to interpret signs, how to communicate with gods, and so forth. Here’s my advice:
The first thing to do is to research. You can’t expect to find out what deity you’re connected to if you don’t know the gods’ names and can’t recognize their iconography when you see it. You have to have at least narrowed it down to a pantheon. You don’t have to stick within one pantheon going forward (syncretism is great!), but if you’re new to paganism, you need somewhere to start. If you’re seeing ravens everywhere, then that could be the Morrigan or Odin or Apollo, and you can’t know which one it is until you know which pantheon you’re working with. Chances are, you’ll find yourself especially drawn to one particular pantheon.
While you’re doing that research, see if there’s any particular gods you’re interested in. It doesn’t have to be a deeply-felt spiritual connection, it can be something trivial like “I like this god’s myth” or “this god’s aesthetic is cool.” Even better if you find some aspect of the god relatable, or the god’s domain is directly relevant to your life. As you do more and more research, you might find that certain gods just “click” for you. If you feel irresistibly compelled to research a particular god, especially if it’s not a god that you would normally have gravitated towards, that’s a sign that the god is interested in you. That was my experience. I found my patron deity because he basically poked me until I paid attention. He was not the god I expected to be my patron deity. Once I did more in-depth research into him, everything about him resonated for me, and I related to him far more than I expected.
I also experienced signs and synchronicities. If you feel inexplicably drawn to a particular god, you may start to see signs. Signs are obvious. If you have to ask if something is a sign, it probably isn’t one. I’ve seen innumerable questions that ask “I’ve been seeing [blank] everywhere, which god is calling me?” If you don’t already know, then it probably isn’t a sign. What makes something a sign is that you think of the god when you see it. It’s pretty pointless for a god to use a sign to call your attention to it if you don’t know which god it’s calling attention to. So, you have to already be familiar with the iconography (symbols, animals, plants, tools or weapons, colors, etc.) of the gods in your pantheon before you can start recognizing signs. Signs usually happen in chains called synchronicities, meaning, you get a series of wild coincidences that draw your attention to whatever idea or symbol is being repeated. If a god is interested in working with you, then it will most likely present itself to you in the most unsubtle manner possible, and you will know. If you want to get a sign, you should ask (out loud) to receive one within a certain time frame, so that you know to be looking for one.
I’m lucky enough to have a patron deity, and also to have a natural gift for mysticism. Of all the different skills under the occult umbrella (including spellcraft, herbalism, divination, evocation, herbalism, alchemy, numerology and gematria, astrology, clairvoyance, lucid dreaming, energy healing, and so on), this is the one I’m gifted with. But I’ve realized that my interactions with the gods are not typical, and that they’re also a result of certain weird skills that I’ve spent years honing in my own time. It’s not realistic to expect that every newbie is going to be able to relate to the gods in the same way.
You don’t have to wait for a god to “call” you. Ancient pagans didn’t do this. They worshipped all the gods who were relevant to their lives, both the big-name gods and the small local ones. If a god does call you, that’s a wonderful thing, but this may or may not happen. You can’t control whether a god chooses you or not, so don’t wait for one to do so. You shouldn’t put your practice on hold just for that.
Modern discourse about deity work places a disproportionate emphasis on patron deities, gods that have an intimate personal connection with you. There’s a couple reasons why this is. One is the popularity of Wicca, which laid a lot of the groundwork for the modern conversation on deity work. Another is that most people are coming from Christianity, in which a “personal relationship with God” is often a big thing, and people are so used to monotheism that they adopt a henotheistic approach to paganism. But I think another reason is that we don’t really have anything else to work off of. Most of us do not have a living tradition of polytheistic worship to use as a baseline for interaction with gods. Without doing a ton of really academic research and painstaking reconstruction, personal experience becomes most visible type of interaction with the gods. The people who are gifted with a natural connection to the gods are going to stand out, but because there’s no established system of worship, they set the standard for everyone else instead of being the outliers. That leaves people who don’t have mystical gifts, training, or skills feeling lost, like they’re doing something wrong.
If you don’t receive signs, significant dreams, or direct divine connection, you are not doing anything wrong. There’s lots of other ways to connect to the gods besides mystical experiences. Historically, mystical experiences were rare, and most people had to be initiated into secret societies called mystery cults in order to have them. Expecting a mystical experience right out of the gate is setting the bar way too high. If you’re just starting out, then what you need to do is focus on developing a relationship with the gods like you would a person. That means investing in them, through offerings, devotional acts, research, prayer, festivals, or whatever else feels right to you.
Some other misconceptions about gods:
You do not have to work with only one god. That’s the main benefit of paganism! You can work with as many gods as you want! The only constraints are the amount of time and resources you have to invest in them all. Gods will not get angry or jealous if you start worshipping or working with another one.
Gods do not anger easily. Mythology may make it seem otherwise, but gods do not actually get angry over petty stuff. I’ve seen that many newbie pagans, especially those who were raised Christian, are afraid that they have angered the gods because they skipped an offering, or put the wrong thing on the altar, or claimed someone was more beautiful than Aphrodite in jest, or masturbated in the same room as the altar, or started worshipping a different god, or whatnot. No matter which gods you worship, they are not going to punish you for stuff like this. They don’t care. They’re aware that modern people can’t follow all the same protocols that ancient people could. What they care about is that you’re sincere. You have to really try to anger them, and if you do, you’re more likely to get an “I’m very disappointed in you” than a show of divine wrath.
Gods do not dislike each other. Another thing I see often is the idea that gods who “hate” each other should not be placed next to each other on the same altar. This is mostly a result of taking myths too seriously. Gods are powerful spiritual entities, not people who hold grudges. They’re portrayed in humanlike ways in myths because it makes for entertaining stories. They’re not going to get mad if you put them on an altar next to a god that they have beef with in a myth, because the myth is just a story and — again — the gods aren’t that petty. They won’t demand to be separated like children who can’t get along.
Gods cannot be impersonated by “trickster spirits.” One of the more insidious misconceptions in modern pagan discourse is the idea that there’s a serious danger of gods being impersonated by “trickster spirits.” This is just a paganized version of the Christian idea that “the devil can appear as an angel of light” and that one must “test the spirits” to ensure that they’re “of God.” To ancient pagans, this would be an absurd notion. When you call on the gods, they answer. Gods can’t be convincingly impersonated by lesser beings. You don’t have to quiz them on mythology or otherwise test them to ensure that they are who they say they are. The entire concept of “trickster spirits” encourages people to doubt their own experiences, even when those experiences are positive, and it needs to die, yesterday!
Use a divination method other than pendulums or candle flames. This isn’t really a misconception so much as my own advice. I’ve also seen a lot of people freak out that their gods are mad at them because a candle flared up or did something weird, and 90% of the time it’s just fire doing what fire does. If your candle wick is too long, the flame will flare up. If it’s too short, the flame will be choked by wax and sputter or go out. It’s not a sign from the gods, it’s just how fire works. Reading candle flames is really unreliable anyway. Pendulums are also less than ideal, because they can only answer yes/no questions, and they’re easily influenced by the answer you want to get. Tarot cards or cleromancy (throwing something like dice, bones, rune stones, etc.), are much better, because you’ll get more complex and nuanced answers with less interference. The best methods, in my experience, are ones that allow gods to speak to you directly without having to use the filter of preset symbols: if you’re more visual, use scrying (gazing into a clear object like a crystal ball, mirror, or bowl of water), and if you’re more auditory, use automatic writing (writing a question and then writing whatever comes to mind as the answer). I’ve found the latter to be extremely effective.
Chances are, once you get started and get to know a few gods, you’ll find at least one that you are especially close with. It may not be the one you want or the one you expect, but it’ll be a valuable experience. And if you don’t feel super connected to a specific one, that’s okay! The great thing about paganism is that you don’t have to choose.
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